I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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