everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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