i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
This beer is not sobering me up at all
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
