I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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