is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
