yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
