We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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