this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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