somebody snuck up and got me drunk
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
