You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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