Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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