Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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