rhymes with "ouble enetration"
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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