What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize