When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
