i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
