i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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