a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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