Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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