I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
