She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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