i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
