I think I won the penis lottery.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
