i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize