I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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