Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
