wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
you never un-have a 4some
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
