y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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