yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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