There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize