im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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