it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
