My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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