Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
