marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
