I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize