I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
