fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
