I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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