I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
