It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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