do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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