...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
