Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
