I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
