JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Randomize
