Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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