sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just threw up on my dentist
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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