we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
