I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
My vagina is officially offended.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize