oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize