I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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