I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
