I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
